Thursday, March 15, 2007

The Annals of Being a Bridesmaid #3

WARNING: C'mon, there's not a woman out there who hasn't had an "accident." But still, we don't advise reading this one while eating.

We called this one "SUNDAY BLOODY SUNDAY." Thanks to the reader who sent this in--it made for an extra laugh at our book party that our friend Will read it.

Aug 14th 2005: a day that will live in infamy.

I was a bridesmaid in my brothers’ wedding, which just happened to also be the hottest day of the year. I woke up that day sick with the flu, and lucky me, started my period. It took all my energy just to get dressed in my very pale yellow bridesmaid’s dress and head out to the ceremony, an hour’s drive away.

It was hot and humid-- the kind of heat where you just can’t breathe. The wedding started and I was just beginning my trek down the aisle when I heard my mother whisper loudly:

“Barb! There’s blood on your dress. There’s BLOOD on your dress!”

So of course I freak out. I didn’t know what to do. There was blood all over the butt of my dress, and 200 people to witness it. I literally wanted to die right on the spot. The other bridesmaids wouldn’t let me run away. Instead, they just put a shawl around me, which only added to the sweat that was dripping down my cleavage, and I had to stand there for over 10 minutes till the vows were over.

Let’s just say after that, I ran to my car and went home. But I still have stains in my car that remind me every day of one of the worst days of my life.

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